Post by Empress Jenna on Jan 26, 2011 18:51:43 GMT -5
The light dims as Jenna, the star of the season, stands up from her seat and walks towards the front, as she does the other jury members all stand up and politely get on their hands and knees as she walks to the front. At the same time rose petals start falling from the sky and a chorus of angels can be heard singing the most amazing lullaby ever. When Jenna reaches her spot in front of the Final 3, the angels and the flowers stop and the jury stands up and sits back down.
Hello. I am going to skip the whole generic stuff, because in all reality it doesn’t matter. You three made it we didn’t, big whoopee-doo. Whatever. Honestly, as I read your answers and your opening statements, I got bored. You failed to talk about something extremely important: me. So, here is the deal, I don’t like any of you [kind of liked Kelly, until I found out she had a pre-game alliance] and I really couldn’t care less about who wins. So my vote is going to be based solely on one thing, who can answer my questions the best. I will read the other jurors q&a but I don’t see them influencing me, because they don’t have the J factor. Before my questions though, I have a couple of statements.
Candice, I talked to you like what, twice? You seemed funny, and honestly you seem smart, but once the merge hit you never tried to relate to me and being the star that could cost you my vote.
Kelly, I like you, you are nice and we had a plan to stick together, but you too the coward way out and when we merged, knowing that I was all alone and had basically no allies, instead of approaching me and including me in your plans, like I did in mine, you threw me under the bus first and didn’t even talk to me. You lost a lot of respect from me and that could cost you my vote.
Erinn… HI, I’M JEEEENNA, CAN YOU UNDERSTAND WHAT I’M SAYING? I’M TALKING, VERY, VERY SLOW SO YOU CAN UNDERSTAND, BECAUSE I AM HONESTLY CONVINCED YOU ARE A RETARD. DO YOU KNOW HOW TO PLAY SURVIVOR? DO YOU UNDERSTAND THE GAME? DO YOU KNOW HOW TO SPELL AND USE CRRECT GRAMMAR? Please don’t answer this questions, I know the answers, they are just rhetoric.
[for those who were wondering the answers are: No. No. No. No. Yes, I am mentally handicapped.][/size]
Now, the questions.
As the star of the season here are ten VERY simple questions [since it’s a short answer q&a it should count as just one question] about me, as I truly can’t care less about any of you, the one who gets the most answers correctly wins my vote.
1. What was I in High School?
2. I am clearly a mactor. I got recruited. How was I “found” for the game?
3. I always said that not only was I absolutely gorgeously breath-taking, but… ______[fill in the blank]
4. During High School I organized a cookie bake sale and a car wash for what cause?
5. Why did I decide to do that challenge with Benry after complaining about it?
6. Clearly I am smart because I know words like “alienated”, which retarded scum-hoe-hag did not know the meaning of the word “alienated”?
7. What lesson did my cheerleadering coach taught me during High School that became a personal motto to me?
8. Who did I vote for during the third TC and why?
9. What is “Jenna’s VIP Palace”?
10. In my last confessional I called someone the “Queen of the Rejects”. Who was I talking about?
Tie-breaker: [in case I don’t feel satisfied]
Who’s vote is this? I will vote for the owner of this vote, simply because that person has something that the others don’t have [since you are all lacking the three B’s: balls, brains and beauty [though number 2 applies mostly to Erinn]] photoshop skills.
Please remember I don’t give a crap about any of you because all three of you suck.
Have fun.
~Jenna.